Wednesday, January 4

A New Year

I know it's been a while since I posted anything on here. Most of you can attest to the craziness that is the holidays during the last part of the year. Mine was no exception. I had a wonderful time with friends and family and am now slowly getting back into the routine we had before all the holidays. We love Christmas and celebrating New Years. Sometimes it's a hit or a miss as far as the latter is concerned, but this year it was a hit. We statyed at home, snacked on some appetizers and Dr. Pepper, and played Lego Star Wars on the Gamecube. At midnight we toasted the hopes and dreams of the new year with some sparkling cider, kissed each other, and then continued to play the Gamecube for another couple of hours. It was great. Now, I am ready to start a new year and see what life has in store for us.

For the past few weeks James and I have been discussing our new years resolutions with each other. I like setting new years goals, even though I hardly ever achieve them. I'll be honest. I can get pretty excited about my goals for the first few weeks into the new years and then something happens and I find I'm always rushing to catch up. I feel like I'm behind most, if not all, of the year and then when it comes time to review those goals I don't measure up. I almost complete some of them, and don't even touch the others. I think maybe I set too many at once, and of those that I set, my expectations at achieving them are too high. In short, I expect too much of myself with the goals I set. I have to learn how to modestly set goals.

So, my goals for this year are small in number, and not too difficult. They are goals which will certainly push me and will be a struggle, but not ones that I think will be too hard for me to do. I'm not going to share them with you, as some of them are more personal in nature, but perhaps at the end of this year I will share them in preparation of the new year.

One that I will share with you is to be OK with who I am. I'm still experiencing some health issues which are proving to be most frustrating. I've had so many tests done and everything comes back as "normal" but yet there is something really wrong. I struggle with trying to understand what I need to learn from this health challenge, and how I can deal with it. I want to not be bitter about it. I want to give it all to God and not worry about it. I want to be able to do what I used to do before, and to me that seems like such a small request but one that I have not been granted. I really want those things, but those might not be the things that the Lord wants for me. I'm a firm believer that we go through trials and challenges for a reason. I know there is a reason out there for why I need to go through this and maybe I can't see or accept it because I am just too bitter about it. I truly do want to learn what the Lord wants me to learn from this so I need to change my thinking and my attitude. It has been such a struggle for me. This year I am going to work on being OK with who I am and that alone is more than likely going to be a challenge enough for me.

I wish everyone a happy and positive New Year. I hope all your best wishes and dreams come true and that your hard work will pay off. Be happy and be good to other people!

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